To My Dad on His Eightieth Birthday

Today is a very special day.

Yes, it’s Friday the 13th.

But it’s also my dad’s eightieth birthday!  So as a special birthday wish I wanted to break from my traditional DIY and design posts to share something from my heart.

A very special message for my dad.

One that wouldn’t fit in one card.

Some thoughts that sometimes I don’t always say but am always thinking. Now that I have two busy little boys and two active dogs not all my thoughts or sentences get finished.

To My Father on His Eightieth Birthday

Dad_yard

Dear Dad,

Thank you for being the best and most supportive father any girl could ask for. In you, I’ve had such a great teacher and role model. I know you think I get everything from mom, but there is so much in me that is you too. Your sheer determination and entrepreneurial spirit. Maybe one day my business will be as successful as your restaurant. A girl can dream right?

You’re an amazing father and grandfather and so amazing with our fur babies, too, especially, Max. He loves cuddling on your lap.

Over nearly 40 years you’ve taught me so much. Too many things to put in one blog post or letter. But here are some of them:

Family is the most important thing.

You always made a point to be there for us. Family trips to the Cape. I remember fondly our strolls through woods. Skating on frozen ponds in Andover followed by the obligatory cup of tomato soup after. Our ice cream dates, where you’d always have to lick around the cone to stop it dripping all over my hands. I remember you always being at every single one of my plays in high school even though the restaurant was so busy. You’ve instilled this in me. Family is everything.

Persistance

The secret to success isn’t the person who is the smartest or the most gifted but the person who is persistent. I’ve seen you face all kinds of adversity from trying to turn around a struggling business to fighting health problems. You know my favorite quote of your’s is:

“If you throw enough mud,

Some will stick.”

This saying is on my office wall and also is inscribed on a bracelet. A daily reminder to keep trying, even if I get off track or knocked down. I will never give up.

I’ve watched you persist and succeed.

Dani_Dad

Time Goes Quickly

If feels like just yesterday when we were on Rye Beach playing in the sand, running down the beach. It feels like a moment ago when you were teaching me to ride a bike. I remember being so scared but you running with me to catch me if I fell. Do you remember the first time you took me to the driving range to teach me how to play golf. It feels like only yesterday John was born and you became a grandfather but it was almost 11 years ago. I remember you visiting every day at first. You and mom helping so much with tiny John. I’d look forward to each visit, needing adult conversation and advice. Each day seemed to go so slowly especially when I didn’t know anyone or have mom friends. You said to me, “Dani, you’ll wish for these moments back when they grow older.” You know what, Dad, I do. I can’t believe both my boys are already too big to hold in my arms.

John_Baby

Dreams Come True

In your lifetime I’ve witnessed so many of your dreams come true.

You loved golf and through lots of practice you became a great golfer.

You always dreamed of owning a restaurant. Guess, what you checked that off your list. I’m not sure you knew exactly what you were getting into with all the long hours and stress but over 11 years you made Baldwin’s such a special place. You made the best drinks and you and mom were the heart and soul of the restaurant. So many great memories and so much hard work.

You dreamed of living by the sea.

Your home in Scituate Harbor right on Lighthouse Road was so beautiful and I know you enjoyed having the ocean in your backyard. We have such special memories of staying with you and delicious grilled meals on the back patio.

I know dreams come true because I’ve seen all your’s come to life.

Girls Are Equal to Boys

I kind of never thought about this growing up. I didn’t know in life there might be times where I was overlooked for a position or not qualified because I was a girl. You always valued my viewpoint and encouraged me in my education. I remember our trips to look at colleges, getting lost in Yonkers (yup, I can’t read maps) and the whole family including the dog coming to Mount Holyoke College, the oldest women’s college. You may not have realized it but you raised a feminist. 😉 I also remember you brining me to the UK for my year abroad. What fun we had with Adrian soaking up the sites of Wales, Yorkshire and London before heading to Bristol. I’m so glad I had my safety net there for my first week in England. I thought it would be just like America because we all speak English but it was so veery different and took some time to get acclimated and make friends.

Wedding Photo

Old House Love.

I like to think I got my love of old houses from you and mom. Watching you renovate the cape on Bartlet Street and fix up the colonial mansion into a restaurant has left an indelible mark on my being. Old homes are the best!

Be Kind. Be Humble.

Kindness and humility go a LONG way in life. You have so much of both. You’re so giving and kind. Many people don’t realize all you have accomplished.

IceCream_Conor

It’s Never too Late to Dream a New Dream

Watching you have a second career after you lost your job taught me it is never too late to dream a new dream or take on a new challenge. You redid that restaurant until it sparkled then you opened and worked so hard morning, noon and night. You taught yourself how to run a successful business and how to bartend despite not drink yourself.

Reading

Dad, you are truly amazing. I could go on and on and on. There’s so very much I’ve learned from you. I love you and so do Luke, John, Conor and our two fury babies, Max and Poppy.

Happy Birthday to you!

Dad

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Colleen
Colleen
7 years ago

Wow! What a beautiful birthday tribute….am crying reading this because it is just so touching and sweet!

Patti
Patti
7 years ago

Happy Biryhday to your Dad! Such a beautiful letter to your Dad!

Betty Whatley
7 years ago

I quite agree. What a wonderful tribute to your dad on his birthday. You and so many of us are blessed that we had such great and loving parents and great memories. Thee are so many that did not have the opportunity that we did. I am so happy that you shared these memories with all of us. It certainly brought back some wonderful memories for me. These are things that can’t be bought or things that can be taken away from you. I know my nieces and nephews are always bringing things up that mother and dad taught them,… Read more »

Joan
Joan
7 years ago

What a lovely birthday gift!

Stephanie C
Stephanie C
7 years ago

What a beautiful tribute to your dad. Yesterday would have been my dad’s 87th birthday. In the spring we’ll mark 20 years without him. How I wish I had done something similar for my dad while he was still alive. Your post makes me realize just how short life is & we must let our loved ones know how important they are before it’s too late.

Rosalina
7 years ago

Loved reading this. What a blessing you have been given. My dad died when I was very young so I never knew him. So many men could certainly have used him as a role model, what an example. May he be blessed with many more birthdays.

Janet
Janet
7 years ago

Another success of your dad (and mom)…is you. I have no doubt they are proud of the person you’ve become. They raised you well, and I wouldn’t be surprised if they felt that is their greatest accomplishment. Seeing your child (young or adult) happy in life is something to celebrate. Cheers to family and people like your dad & mom who know that supportive & loving parents help guide their children to grow up to be strong, kind, and confident and so it goes to the next generation.

K of TAF
7 years ago

Wow… what a wonderful idea – now I wish I’d done the same for my Dad on his 80th this past September. It’s a moving tribute and I was touched to have been let in to such a fulfilling, joyful and rich life so far. Daughters ALWAYS need their Dads… Love this.

Shannon Fox
7 years ago

Happy Birthday to your Daddy!
This was a lovely post.

Debrashoppeno5
7 years ago

What an amazing Dad and Mom you have. This is a wonderful tribute to your Dad and I expect he is so proud of you and all of your accomplishments.

Karen on Bainbridge Island
Karen on Bainbridge Island
7 years ago

What a lovely tribute to a lovely man. You are a lucky girl. I too got a winning ticket in the father department and your dad shares similar traits to my dad. My father always made me feel special and capable and loved. I had a successful career, a successful marriage and a successful life because my father made sure I understood all those things were mine if I was willing to work for them….and he was right. I miss him everyday. he’s been gone since 1984…gone way to soon. I am happy for you that your dad is with… Read more »

Lacey
Lacey
1 year ago

What a lovely, inspiring tribute! You’ve expressed so eloquently how I feel about my own father, now turning 88 years. I want to write something special to him, and how he enriched the lives of my mother, me, my siblings and his own parents and friends. He is a remarkable and humbled person, who has been steadfast and reliable and loving through some very dark times. Thank you for sharing your experience with us!

Cookie Eddings
Cookie Eddings
5 months ago

I got lost from your blog, and I miss it! Please put me on your list so I can once more receive your emails. Thanks so much.